Monday, December 20, 2004

One Hundred Boring Little Details

1. I was born on August 31, 1980.
2. At 1:15 AM.
3. If my mom had been able to hold out just another 23 hours, I'd have beautiful sapphire as a birthstone instead of ugly perodite.
4. I have lived in the same city my entire life.
5. When I was about a year old, I took off all my clothes and drew all over myself with a blue Sharpie.
6. My parents have pictures.
7. I also did the same thing with poo from my diaper.
8. My parents have pictures of that, too.
9. When I was about 3, a drunk driver crashed his truck into the side of our house. The cab of the truck was sitting in our living room, across from my bedroom. It's still one of my most vivid memories.
10. When I was in third grade, I cheated on a multiplication test and got caught. It was those damn 7s!
11. I have a sister who's three years younger than me (J.), a sister who's nine years younger (K.), and a brother who's ten years younger (J.R.).
12. Growing up I was super jealous of my sister, J., because she had gorgeous white-blonde hair and bright blue eyes. I got my parents' plain brown hair and brown eyes. She also picked up a short gene from somewhere - no one in my family is shorter than 5'8", but she's barely 5'2". Her hair's darkened a bit over the years, but she's still ridiculously beautiful. She also has big boobs. Or they might just look big since she's so tiny. But still, I want some!

13. I have a huge extended family (my mom has three sisters and three brothers) and am very close to all of my cousins (of which I'm the second oldest). I love holidays when everyone gathers in my grandparents' little house and it's just completely crazy with kids running around everywhere.
14. I hope my sisters and brother and I all have lots of kids so we can replicate that feeling later.
15. I went to a small Catholic grade school all the way from kindergarten to 8th grade, mostly with the same 40 kids all the way through.
16. I was not popular.
17. At all.
18. I still can't believe how mean kids can be to one another.
19. I hated life in 7th and 8th grade.
20. After that, I went to a small Catholic high school for the next four years - only this time it was an all-girls school.
21. The stories you hear about Catholic school girls? They're all true.
22. Mostly.
23. I am not friends with anyone I went to grade school with anymore.
24. I really miss one of my best friends from high school, who stopped talking to me after her boyfriend got in a fight with a friend of AMBF (neither me nor AMBF were involved). On the off chance that she'll Google herself and see this, ALEISA LEWIS PLEASE CALL ME!
25. I have a friend whose ex-boyfriend's middle name was Libby. That still cracks me up.
26. I got my first tattoo (a sun on my lower back) when I was 18, and a senior in high school.
27. I was the second girl in my high school class to get a tattoo.
28. I lied to my mom and told her it was a temporary tattoo for several months until she figured out that if it really was temporary, it'd probably have worn off in a couple weeks.
29. I now have that tattoo (though much expanded) and another one (butterfly) on the back of my neck.
30. I got my tongue pierced when I was 19, and only did it because I had gone with a friend who was getting her first tattoo, and she wanted me to get something done too.
31. Right after I got it done, I called my mom from the payphone on the corner to tell her. She was absolutely horrified and I think to this day I haven't heard her so upset with me as she was that night.
32. Oh, never mind. I thought of a time when she was even more mad than that. When I was a senior in high school, I went out with a bunch of people from work to a bowling party for someone's birthday, and then to the birthday boy's house afterwards for the after party. My curfew was 1AM. I started talking with SDM (who would eventually become my first long-term boyfriend), and before I knew it, it was like six in the morning. I went home and saw that my parents were still up, waiting for me. I snuck into my bedroom (my room was in the basement and I could use a side door) to avoid them, thinking maybe I could convince them in the morning that they had just missed me come in. Come eight or nine that morning, I woke up to frantic sounds coming from upstairs. I realized they still didn't know I was home, and in order to alert them to my presence, I blasted my radio. I don't remember what happened after that, but I remember I was in BIG trouble.
33. SDM, from the story above, worked overnight at a gym here in town. I used to sneak out of my house at one or two in the morning to take him Subway sandwiches and hang out with him at the gym. Using my parent's van.
34. I stopped doing that when I realized that, if something were to happen to me, my parents would have NO idea where I was or that I was hurt. And that scared me a lot. I'm kind of a pussy.
35. I knew for three years that SDM was cheating on me with a variety of girls, but stuck it out because I thought I wouldn't be able to do better.
36. AMBF proved me WAY wrong on that one.
37. When I was in high school, one of my friends told me I had ugly toes. It was years before I would wear sandals again. And, by the way, I have great toes.
38. I loved the girls I was friends with in high school. I really need to look them up.
39. My sophomore year of college was probably the most fun year of my life.
40. I'm a very touchy-feely person. I love being close to people.
41. Two of my favorite things are having someone draw on my back with the tips of their fingers and
42. Having someone play with my hair. I always make kids I babysit do this to me.
43. I love baby-sitting. If I won a lottery, I'd quit my job and work at a daycare.
44. My favorite movie is "The Princess Bride". I love the book, too.
45. I also love "Beauty and the Beast" (Disney-style).
46. I actually made AMBF drive all the way to Kansas City with me when "Beauty and the Beast" was playing at an IMAX theater there. It was totally worth it.
47. I'm not scared of snakes or bats, but I'm not too fond of crickets.
48. I think my dad pretty much knows everything.
49. My favorite Girl Scout Cookies are Carmel De-Lites.
50. I love driving a stick shift. (Halfway done!)
51. My first car was a Ford Tempo that was just a couple years younger than I was. It was a stick. I didn't know how to drive a stick. My dad tried to teach me, but he just made me cry. So one day when my parents weren't home, I took my sister (who I was babysitting) out and taught myself. I got stuck on a hill for what seemed like hours, but I learned!

52. I am working on being less lazy. And doing good!
53. When I was 13, I went to Jordan for six or so weeks with my aunt and cousins to visit her in-laws. It was amazing, and to this day negative Arab stereotypes hurt me very personally whenever I hear them.
54. My stomach is grumbling very loudly right now.
55. Growing up, I wanted super-long Crystal Gayle hair.
56. I also wanted to be a marine biologist.
57. I love to read. It might just be my favorite thing in the entire world.
58. How much of a dork am I for admitting that?
59. A huge one.
60. I used to be a great artist in high school. I even sold a couple of pictures that I did. I haven't done anything in a long time, but every once in a while I think about starting again.
61. I don't because I'm scared I won't be good anymore.
62. I thought of something I love more than reading. Traveling! I love to go new places.
63. I've broken my nose and a toe, but never anything major. I kind of wish I had, just once. Casts are kind of cool.
64. I am not the kind of person to send back food at a restaurant, unless it's covered in cheese and I specifically asked for no cheese. I don't like melted cheese.
65. I think it'd be fun to be on a talk show where they bring out some guy that you used to know that's been in love with you all these years and you had no idea.
66. I can play football pretty well, and throw the ball NOT like a girl!
67. I would love to do all sorts of exciting, adventurous things like skydiving and spuelunking and white water rafting and mountain climbing and learning to fly a plane.
68. I was a cheerleader in high school.
69. I still have the outfit!
70. I was also a debater. An immature debater who laughed at the name "Kant." And things like "I'm a master debator!"
71. I always forget to take my vitamins.
72. I have a bag of stuffed animals in my garage that I kept from when I was younger.
73. When I was in high school, I went on a backpacking treck with eleven other girls through New Mexico. It was amazing. We carried absolutely everything - food, tents, toilet paper - and hiked eight million miles. Maybe not, but it felt like it. One of the girls I met on that trip is a great friend, and the best thing is - we haven't seen each other since then. Just that one time, but we talk all the time.
74. I want to explore a rainforest.
75. When I was little, my dad told me you could open a stuck jar lid by blowing on it. I believed that for years.
76. I want to be on "The Amazing Race," but I would probably lose because I would be taking too many pictures and spend too much time talking to the locals.
77. I don't care how cheesy the acting is or how repetitive the stories get, I love CSI. And CSI: Miami to a lesser extent. CSI: NY, I can take it or leave it.
78. I am a punctuation Nazi. A huge pet peeve of mine is when signs misplace commas, apostrophes, and periods.
79. I love ice cream!
80. I was unimpressed by the Mona Lisa when I saw it up close and personal. But damn, the Eiffel Tower was amazing.
81. A personal failing of mine is that I can't iron very well. I always seem to iron more wrinkles in than I get out.
82. I love Seattle but hate Los Angeles.
83. I would love to be an imbedded news photographer, traveling with the troops or some adventure team, documenting events in far-away places.
84. I could never be a vegetarian. I love meat. (heh heh)
85. I wish I was 100% of some ethnic background, so I could fully embrace that culture's traditions.
86. I lose things. A lot.
87. I have two fish and two snails. One of each at work and home.
88. I am endlessly amused by said fish and snails.
89. I love the TV show LOST. I have a girl-crush on Kate. And also Grey's Anatomy. And also What Not to Wear, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Family Guy, Scrubs, The Office (seriously, Jim, marry me?), and I guess just TV in general.
90. I rock Suduku.
91. I try to work out four or five times a week, but I'm not very consistent. I wish I was.
92. The Dick Van Dyke show is awesome.
93. Lasagna is my specialty, but not my favorite meal.
94. I love honey barbeque and honey mustard sauces.
95. A good filet mignon that just melts in your mouth, like the way AMBF cooks it, is my favorite food.
96. I can type 50 WPM with 99% accuracy.
97. I love the smell of AMBF's shampoo and soap. Mmmmm.
98. I have dimples, I'm left-handed, and I have an outie belly-button.
99. I don't have a lucky number.
100. I don't care what anyone says, "Hit Me Baby One More Time" is an awesome song.


Anonymous said...

This is from Dembr 2004?
I have no memory of this.
This is the most honest and touching post you've ever published.

To think I like you so much from way over here and some asshole who knew you in person was cheating on you? Fcuking idiot.
I am pleased that you are well shot of him.

And the feet thing too. I have a thing for girls feet so I think it was a terrible waste that you gave up on the sandals.

Pics of the tattoos please.

Catholic girls school. Mmmm.

The story about you and the van? Mucg respect. Classic. And ultimately, how sensible!

The best years are yet to come...

Go Lightly,


Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous Midwest Girl said...

Anon, FYI, this isn't actually from December 2004. I just started it the other day. But since it's so long, and going to be even longer, I didn't want to make it an actual post, so I just made it the oldest and linked it.

I appreciate your commnets; you're always so nice. :) Maybe pics will come someday...except they're on my back so hard to take a picture of. Hmmmm.

Anonymous said...

I am nice, amn't I?
Oh I like that you're adding to this, it means I can keep coming back and finding out new stuff.

But you are cheating AMG! 'Cause that stuff about your sister and her hair was not there a few days ago. Lucky I checked!
You are one sly girl AMG.

'Bout them tatoo pics, I reckon AMBF wouldn't mind taking some photos of your naked back. In the name of enlightening your readers of course.

What was wrong with your grade school?
They didn't like smart, funny, attractive people?
Were the stupid dorks jealous of you?
I pity them.
I am not surprised you no longer see any of those foolish, foolish asses.

I have tried googling Aleisha Lewis vainly thinking I might bring two lost souls together but alas! All I can find is a website offering cheap Ukranian brides. Was Aleisha Ukranian? 'Cause if she was, you could get in touch with AND get a wife for like, the price of a flight. One way.

I have never seen the Princess Bride!!
What's up with that?

When I was in a cave in India (You know how it is) I was flashing my torch about and suddenly all these bats were flying over, about, around me. I was SCARED!

Another time I was wandering up a dark deserted tower staircase when I heard a screeching. I swung up my torch to reveal a vulture on it's nest spreading it's wings and being threatening.
I was scared then too.
But that's not relevant.
Just thought I'd mention it.

I don't like snakes either.

My stomach is not grumbling right now.

I am still amazed that anyone would treat you less than then the Princess you obviously are.

And I still think the best years are yet to come...


Anonymous said...

Seriously, you still have the cheer leading outfit?
That's just teasing people and you know it.

I just looked at your profile pic. You broke your nose? It healed pretty good, ha?

How'd you break them? That must be a story. Was it sky-diving, sperlunking, white-water rafting, mountain climbing or flying a plane?

My friend is learning to fly a plane. He talks a lot about the weather these days.

Speaking of Mountain Climbing, I climbed Everest. Really. It was hard. But I did meet my girlfriend in a little town on the slopes. Also true. Though we have now broken up. Sometimes I go off on tangents.

I can see you in a creche. Despite not knowing you. I think it's the big family thing.

I absolutely insist, demand, call for and plead with you to begin drawing again.
God, it IS hard to go back to those things.
I studied drama at college. Do you know when the last time I acted was?
Tell you what, if I apply for a post-grad in drama, will you start drawing?

I absolutely believe you'd be good.
You don't have anything to lose.


conversation with myself said...

Is it possible you are writing your blog as an entrant in a Boring Contest (open to all shallow "awesome" people)? Seriously, I'm serious.

Anonymous said...

Oh Conversation with Myself,

this section of AMG's blog may be more introspective than the rest but I like that.

It's the one part of the blog she tells us more about herself. That's a nice thing.
Instead of random thoughts, it's a liite bit personal. Yet funny.
What's not to like?

I think you need to read it in the spirit in whuich it is offered; not too serious but genuine.


Anonymous Midwest Girl said...

Conversation, one of the reasons this was relegated to just a link on the sidebar and not an actual post was because I was fairly sure most people (Anon being the wonderful exception) wouldn't care too much. And this is a meme, a "tag," that bloggers pass around to other bloggers to fill out and learn more about each other - the same as the two other links in this section. I wasn't just being egotistical and randomly decided to make a list about myself.

It's also interesting that you posted this under this particular post and not one of the main posts. If you find them that boring, you are welcome to - this is going to be a big news flash, I know - not read them!

Anonymous said...

You were unimpressed with the Mona Lisa??!!
Wow. I was so ready to be unimpressed, I thought it's just one more painting in a gallery of thousands but when I did...
I just sort of understood. It IS great. If those pesky tourists would just clear off!!

Ironing is wierd. It's just, I don't know. No matter how carefull you go, you can NEVER get it like Mom did. I can never fold them like she did either. I have asked her to show me (Very macho) but it just isn't as good.
My Monm tells me it is but it isn't.
I really don't spend a lot of time thinking about this. No, really.

A rainforest would be cool.
Though at the rate I hear they're disappearing it soon won't be so much exploring as blink-and-you'll-miss-it.

I STIll forget to take my vitamins. I have a box around here somewhere...

Well, who doesn't love Ice Cream? but what's your favourite flavour, now that would be information.
Information every AMBF should have.

Text messages are killing spelling. Punctuation is already in critical condition.

CSI is way boring!! Sheesh.

Kant is kinda funny. It sounds like a rude word Eddie Izzard would say. But the debating thing obviously paid off. Look at the well reasoned and constucted arguments you make every day in your blog, you are a born thinker, ha?

I read through the whole list thing again.

You drew on yourself with poo?!
How did I not mention that before?
What was going on there?
That is without doubt, messed up.


Keir said...

I betcha I could draw AMG's home state map, freehand. I know the capital, too. Doesn't matter which state it is- or, hell, what country she's visited- I could draw them all and list all kinds of boring stuff about them. Stupid party trick of mine.

I suppose that's a poor way to repay AMG for saying that she liked my band, so I'll simply add a "Thank You Very Much, AMG" to that. Sooner or later though, she'll have to say where she lives if we have to tour there. Or come to California where we usually play.

Anonymous said...

Aww, I have never been to Seattle or Los Angeles but I am hoping to live in Beverly Hills at some stage so I hope it's not ALL bad.

I believe in the term is "Embedded" but would you? I always got the impression that you were an impartial news sorta girl. Not the "fair and balanced" type.
But far away places- aww, love love love. Better do it now or soon I'll be too old. Or they'll be gone.
Or something.

Regarding losing things, jokes about anyone's virgintiy are clearly unacceptable here so I will jsut ask you for a funny story about losing things - how about it?

Hey, you're 100% mid-western, right?
Embrace that!


Anonymous said...

Before you say that "Wow, you are quick at getting the comments in", let me say it for you.

Yes I am.


D said...

Great post, great blog. Hilarious.

New Mexico backpacking...Philmont?

Scoot said...

Have to agree with you on #77. CSI:Miami. Horatio....and the way he talks...with all those pauses...[takes sunglasses off]has to be...[puts sunglasses back on] of those things... [purses lips with hands on hips while looking down] that just cracks me up.

Anonymous said...

You put 86 and 88 together and it all makes sense.
So that's where those missing socks are going eh?

Personally, I have a crush on Shannon. I don't know why that is, Kate's just too... not bitchy?

We have 2 fish in my aprtment, I have to say, they're not so amusing. What am I doing wrong?

You rock Sodoku? Then you are a woman of infinite patience.

Filet Mignon. Mmmm.

4 or 5 times a week? Jeez. That is a whole lot of working out. No wonder you don't always make that-it is ambitious.

Lasik eye? What?

Yeah. I await to see what happens on this page from here on...
Go for 200?


Anonymous said...

100; Hee hee.
It certainly is.

And it's made all the more poignant by the fact that it's about Britney's time as a recovering smack addict.

God bless Britney, the come-back is on it's way...


Paladin said...

D- since AMG seems to have left the building as far as this thread goes, let me answer that indded the New Mexico trip WAS Philmont.

Dad was there for the Training,mom was there as a spouse doing the tours bit. Her sisters did a couple different youth things and her brother was in a Cub Scout program.

A truely AMAZING vacation heartily recommended!

ErinFaye said...

This was the day Nora was born

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

55? I used to have a life-goal set to have hair long enough to sit on. I never achieved it and have since decided it's really not such a great goal to have;>

56? Me, too!

Michael said...

This is Libby, and I resent your comments.

sneaker demon said...

Ah, when younger, who WASN'T jealous of your wonderful younger sister?

Just kidding. I totally remember quite a bit of these things, like you sneaking out. Still the only one of us to have been grounded. Ever.

And you should totally start drawing again. Your talent is one of the many reasons your younger sister is jealous of YOU.

Anonymous said...

AMG, I can tell that most of your posts are coming from the heart, but dont you think that you should stop wasting your time blogging on the internet, you sound like youre for real but the internet is not a way of making friends, I dont know if youll ever read this but these people probably dont care that much about you, you see the anonymous poster before me sounds just like a fucking perv hitting on you and guess how i found youre blog i googled the wrong lyrics of a fucking song, anyways If you ask me you should get off the internet and find real people who care about you maybe your old high-school friends. Trust me the internet is the last thing we need in this crazy fucking world where people cant even talk to each other face to face, what we need is to get out there and get our heads out of our asses and find some real people to care about... Trust me I found that out the hard way.