Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Death Has Come to Your Little Town, Sheriff.

Yesterday, I went and purchased four bags of Halloween candy for Trick-or-Treaters. Let me just say, those costumes had better be DAMN good and the kids DAMN cute for the amount of money I spent. When did candy get so expensive? Those kids are lucky I'm such an awesome person, or they'd be getting pennies and carrot sticks in their bags.

Tonight, I'm going to get pumpkins to carve this weekend. Last year, I didn't decide until the very last minute (say, like, five at night on Halloween) that I wanted to take part in the age-old tradition of squash sculpting. I picked up my brother and sister, who at 14 and 16 were way too cool to participate in such an event but had to since I forced them at gunpoint, and went looking for pumpkins. We drove around the entire city for about two hours, stopping at grocery stores, farmer's markets, roadside stands, and anywhere we thought we may be able to find one with no luck. We met scores of other last-minute shoppers who also couldn't find any. It was the Great Pumpkin Shortage, Charlie Brown!

We finally found some, ironically, at the farm across the street from my house, where I should have gone first, had I any common sense at all. Which I think it's plain I don't. The pickings were slim, but we managed to find four carvable pumpkins, including one albino one that my sister claimed. I carved what is probably the sweetest vampire pumpkin ever, all by myself, without the assistance of those pussy stencils you can buy. I thought it was the sweetest one, anyway, until I saw my brother's simple statement on post-modern America. Brilliant.





17 comments:

sue said...

Oh, so cute!

Hmm...my comment on your last post disappeared? Ghost in the machine?

Alexis said...

I am so right there with you - I have to find like 5 or 6 to carve for my party saturday night (which, if you are in London, please come on by). Oh, the misery of last minute veggie purchasing.

LoriLoo310 said...

The cost of candy is rigged with the cost of gasoline! As is every other damn thing we buy these days. I believe I will be buying a huge bags of mints for $2 from Costco for the little brats in my neighborhood. Only take one please ... if I see you take two I will chase you down the street to retrieve the stolen sweet. And for payment of making me run, I will steal the biggest candybar in your bag and kick you while you're down too. Haloween is all about consentual thievery. Trick or treat, dumbass.

Justice said...

Speaking of Charlie Brown, his Halloween special was on last night. I've seen it a million times and still love it.

mwp said...

Looks like your sister was on to something...

Click here.

exile said...

we used to buy the absolute cheapest candy we could find, like big lots rejects. but we made such an awsome haunted house that kids kept comming even when we were completely out of candy.

Silent All These Years said...

My favorite pumpkin carving memory was when I was 21. My college roommate and I spread out in the laundry room and flung pumpkin guts at each other for hours. It was hilarious! The photos alone are priceless.

Mark said...

I love the smiley face!! I'm totally stealing that for next year.

Sangroncito said...

I love Halloween and it doesn't exist here in Brazil...WAAAAAAAAA!

Ruben said...

You know...I don't read this blog enough anymore. Cute pumpkins pumpkin! :-)

Wez said...

Hi Mr. Pumpkin Head.

Anonymous said...

Simple statement on Post-modern America? It's a smiley face.
Am I missing something?

You AMG, after designing a personal tattoo and carving a very cool pumpkin, are most definitely an artist. Start drawing!!

I'm in an apartment block, do you think kids will call around?
Sigh. Better some candy just in case.

Pesky kids.

*

echrai said...

I'm such a halloweenie. This totally makes my holiday. I'm so bummed out that I really have no reason to dress up, go out, or do anything this weekend. :( And somehow, putting on the costume to sit at home and study seems so WRONG. Then again, would my roommates expect anything less from me?

scott c said...

Holy crap. I just got the quote in your title. Too bad it took me like two days. Well done.
sc.

Walking Wounded said...

This will be my first Halloween in this town and I hope it is fun. I'll be getting my last minute emergency candy in case all the kids here in my development do beatdown my door looking for goodies.

I'll be here watching scary movies - too bad it ain't on a Saturday, really. Maybe I would see the shit really hit the fan then! LOL

Peace

THE J Mo said...

Great job on your vampire pumpkin!

Anonymous said...

hahha..really pumpkinastic...!!!