Tuesday, February 07, 2006

If Only I'd Thought of This a Hundred Years Ago, I'd Be Rich!


For some reason, I don't really like drinking out of cups. I much prefer drinking out of straws or cans or, preferably, bottles (particularly when said bottles contain beer). I don't know why I prefer bottles over cups; maybe I wasn't breast fed enough as a child. Or maybe I'm just a drunk.

So, anyway, at work, I have a supply of empty water bottles, like - how relevant! - the one on the left there. No, your left. There you go.

Every day I fill a bottle up with ice and water. The only thing is, the mouth of the bottle is so small, it's hard to get the ice in. Even the crushed ice that the machine dispenses. So I kind of use my hand to funnel the ice into the bottle. And inevitably end up getting ice all over the place.

Yesterday, as I was doing this, I had the following thought process:

Gahhh. Maybe I should just cut off the top of this bottle so the opening is bigger. Actually, you know, what they should do is make a water bottle where the cap is attached to the top of the bottle, and it unscrews a bit further down, so when you unscrew it it's unscrewing at a wider part of the bottle, so you can easily get the ice in. Oh, my god, this is brilliant. And you know what else? They should put a handle on the side of it to make it easier to carry. Holy cow. Okay, what's the number to the patent office? This idea is friggin amazing. Oh, good, there's N-Dawg. I need to tell him about this.

"N-Dawg! Ohmigod! Listen to this awesome idea I had!" I proceed to explain said awesome idea.

He looks a bit confused, then looks down at what he's carrying in his hand, holds it up, and asks, "Um, wouldn't that just be....this?"

That's right. I had just invented the travel coffee mug.

Patent office, you may disregard the messages I left for you.

6 comments:

David Stehle said...

I think you weren't breastfed enough. You can't be an official drunk until you drink from a bottle wrapped in a brown bag.

Anonymous said...

Sure, okay the travel coffe mug exists but it's a mug.
It's all about the marketing. Just tell people that it's a re-usable, re-sealable wide-neck BOTTLE and no one will be any the wiser.
And you will be a millionaire-ess.

By the way, does inventing run in your family?
Or are you just all obsessed with beverages and their delivery systems?

It must be the breast-feeding thing.

*

FletcherDodge said...

This kind of thing happens to me all the time. Like the time I thought of the idea for attaching a small internal combustion engine to a drive train mechanism affixed to a four-wheeled carriage as a form of locomotion.

Jaime said...

or you could get a nalgene bottle

sue said...

HA!

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