Monday, February 21, 2005

Not Only Evil, But Retarded to Boot!

Since we already had the discussion about how evil I am, let's move on to a post about how retarded I am (no offense meant to anyone reading this who might actually be retarded).

Just a few hours ago (three hours and fifty minutes ago, to be exact), I posted about President's Day and how I hate all those who have today off work.

I wrote that post.

I know today is President's Day.

I know that government agencies are off today.

So why did I drive to the DMV to register my car during my lunch break today? And cackle mightily when I pulled into the parking lot and there were only a few cars there, thinking that by going at three in the afternoon on a Monday I had somehow foiled the system and managed to avoid the hour-long lines? And feel like a complete dumbass when I realized that the office was dark and that there was very few cars there...as in no one was there.

Wow. I belong in a special category of intelligence, a category which I also happen to share with rocks.

18 comments:

Homer Jay said...

Welcome to early onset alzheimers.

Homer Jay said...

Welcom to early onset alzheimers.



Wait, did I already say that?

Adisa said...

Your level of intelligence is still leaps and bounds beyond the ones “protecting” this country (i.e., CIA, FBI, etc.).

LeRoy said...

At least you knew it was President's Day. I sat in my living room all day determined to speak to the mailman when he came about the Post Office's inability to properly deliver mail to us. All day I waited. All day. Finally, I figured that he must be keen to my plan and was avoiding our house so I went outside to look for him. I couldn't find him. I was sad; I hate being outsmarted by the mailman. Then I realized my mistake, and that I am in fact, outsmarted by all things. I join you and the other rocks.

Walking Wounded said...

Ha, that's so funny I did the same thing today waiting for the mail-lady. The mail-lady I have is such duck if there is like an inch of snow on my walk she passes my house without a pause. So I was out today early to get the walk shoveled and was waiting for her then it downed on me that it was President's Day.

We're all ready for Pfizer!

Steve said...

Wait. It was President's Day? I wondered why the office was so empty...

echrai said...

So I was cackling away at your apparent stupidity, which I showed to a couple of friends, since they wondered why I was maniacally chortling at my computer. Which is when I start complaining about my roommate and the fact that she hasn't brought me today's mail. Yes, after reading all about your President's Day faux pas and reading all the responses, many of them regarding the lack of mail service, I was complaining about not getting my mail. Yeah. Hi, I'll be the rock over there with the little pointy paper hat that has "Dunce" written on it.

Desultory Girl said...

Hey girlie, Don't worry about the lapse in judgement. I work holiday's all the time. I can say yes I work holiday's and hardly get them off. Believe me when I say this, but you're not the only jack ass that expects every place to be operating, I'm one too! LOL

Robert said...

Well, at least you got a good parking spot. I, in fact, was wondering where the crowds were at the mall. Oh, and I wouldn't worry about offending the retarded readers. They won't get it anyway.

Jer said...

interesting...evil and retarded...doesn't being "retarded" excuse someone for being "evil" coz he/she is not in the right frame of mind to veiw right and wrong?...oh well..how did you end up on my blog? nice reading your comment, rock on!

jer

NJ said...

Thanks for sharing your retardedness, got me smiling. I did walk down to the street to get the mail too.

The Author said...

I live in Canada. We all had to work yesterday.

But we get the 3rd Monday in May off every year to celebrate the former Queen's (Victoria's) birthday, so I guess I can't complain.

We also get a the 1st Monday in August off simply to have a day off in the summer.

You all should move here.

Anonymous Midwest Girl said...

I love Canada. I love Boutros. Maybe we should hook up.

The Author said...

Well, what are you waiting for? I live:

HERE

Dan said...

We're laughing at you, not with you! ;)

Thanks for your comment, by the way.

exile said...

yeah, i think we all do that. i went to the atm at the bank and watch a guy curse at the locked bank door. "how can they fucking close on my only lunch break."

thequeen said...

I'm so glad to know I'm not the only one who has these moments. And there is a special group. I'm the vice president.

exile said...

here's a story to make you feel better.

once i went with a friend of mine to the Museum Of Tolerance. The museum is dedicated to jewish sufferage, the holocost, and so on. it's all about the jewish herritage. the friend i went with, the whole drive there, told me about what an expert she was on jewish culture. when we got ther the museum was closed. i knowticed on the door of the building that there was a star of david on it. so i turned to the jewish expert and said "this is museum centered on jewish culture, so why did you come here on a saturday? did Miss Expert forget about the whole 'no work on the Sabbath' thing?"

that was 4 hours lost on a saturday for both of us.