Thursday, September 29, 2005

I Don't Remember How It Ends, But You're Mother's a Whore

It's a fairly widely accepted fact that Saturday Night Live has been...well, less than stellar the last few years. There are a few great performances or skits here and there, strung together by meaningless, non-comedic stretches of time during which you think to yourself that watching the Ron Popeil infomercial on channel three might be a better time.

However, throughout SNL history, one particular series of sketches has been my absolute favorite, and has never failed to amuse me. Far more than, say, the Crystal Clear Gravy commercial.



That's right, it's Celebrity Jeopardy! Some enterprising spirit has gathered each of the Celebrity Jeopardy SNL skits into one convenient site, which you can view here.

My favorite is the one with Sean Connery, Robin Williams, and Catherine Zeta-Jones (which is number nine from the link above). I should really just let you watch it, but my fingers just keep typing and I guess I'm going to share a choice piece of the transcript with you:

Alex Trebek: Sean Connery, why don't you pick?
Sean Connery: Well, the game is afoot. I'll take 'anal bum cover' for 7,000.
Alex Trebek: That's 'an album cover', not 'anal bum cover'.
Sean Connery: I can read, Trebek. That says anal bum cover. I've spent five years of my life trying to invent an anal bum cover, and failing to do so is my greatest regret.
Alex Trebek: You have led a horrifying life.

29 comments:

stretch td said...

This post wasn't here ... then it was.

I just wanted to give you my 2 cents. Will Farrell was on last week (a repeat) ... too funny for words.

Mon said...

I agree, SNL sucks lately. But I do laugh until I cry when Amy Poehler does the Kaitlin skits!!!!

JRae said...

SNL always seems crappy at the time, and then awesome in retrospect. It's always been a smattering of good sketches in between so-so ones, since the beginning of time... it's just easier after some time passes to remember only the good sketches and not the crappy ones.

That's my SNL theory of comedic value being inversely proportional to the amount of time passed since the original airing, anyway. ;)

Dude, one of my favorite Sean Connery Jeopardy skecthes is when he goes:

SC: "The Penis Mightier for $200, please!"

AT: "That's The Pen Is Mightier..."

Hehehe. ;)

DIAMONDKT said...

Wil Farell never fails to make me laugh no matter what. He can be in a not so funny skit or movie and still it's just him that makes it good. I never understand how some people don't like him. I love him!

Geez said...

Connery: "I'll take the "The Rapists," for 1000"

Trebeck: That's "Therapists."

mwp said...

Celebrity Jeopardy was definitely SNL's bread + butter during the Ferrell era. That shit never got old.

My favorite might've been the one with Jimmy Fallon as Nicolas Cage and Drew Barrymore as Clarista Flockhart:

AT: And now Miss Flockhart...who wrote nothing. And your wager? Nothing.

CF: The pen was too heavy...

Wez said...

I love the Celebrity Jepardy skits on SNL! Sean Connery "I'll take swords for 500 Alex."

Trebek "That's S - Words"

ruben said...

damn...i really wanted to leave a long comment but i have to go shopping for an anal bum cover!

LocuTus of Borg said...

I know I am weird, I have only seen like one .. maybe two episodes of SNL. Guess I just never stayed up that late or was interested.

sue said...

I'm with you - lots of things have gone 'downhill' with SNL over the past few years, but I, too,like the Celebrity Jeopardy and I hoot outloud at the commercials that look like the real things and suck you in - then you realize it's one of theirs. They've had some really good ones over the years...!

Weary Hag said...

I got so spoiled growing up with the original cast of SNL that I can't seem to find anything comical at all with the new crew. Nothing can top the originals.

(okay so anal bum covers IS pretty funny stuff. haha)

AlRo said...

Well then, my sweet.. because I'm a neighbourly guy... have yer fill of Celebrity Jeopardy here:

http://www.badtree.com/Celebrity_Jeopardy.php

AlRo said...

my favorite is:

Sean Connery: I'll take The Rapists for 200

Trebek: That's Therapists; not The Rapist.

Jennifer said...

I do have to say, I never really liked the Celebrity Jeopardy after the first 1 or 2 times. It got old, and they always made fun of Sean Connery. I think it's beucase I actually like the real celebrity Jeopardy, and the players are surprisingly smart. But I digress. My favorite recent "sketches" are 2 commercials - the Mom Jeans, and (my ALL TIME FAVORITE) the cockroach trap that tortures the roach. I LOVE it!!!!

cupcakegrrl said...

I read that although Sean Connery was the recurring character, originally it was supposed to be Burt Reynolds.

Darryl Hammond rocks. I saw him doing standup recently and he can do GW Bush perfectly without saying a word. He says W's body language is that of a man awakened in the middle of the night by a noise in his yard-- Took this posture that was defensive and aggressive at the same time. It was hysterical.

Will Ferrell's undeniably brilliant, but Darryl Hammond is the unsung star of SNL in this girl's opinion. Don't know how he never pole-vaulted out of there into stardom. He's been on it for what--12 years?

JaG said...

Hi! I'm on a quest to leave 100 comments in the blogosphere and you're #45!!

Chixulub said...

You are too young to realize how great the 'Crystal Gravy' bit was. Do you remember when Van Halen was not Van Hagar??? For serious, they went down the tubes after 1984, at which time I calculate you are anonymously turning Kindergarten age.

I don't mean this in an insulting way. I barely, just barly, had a social context for another SNL fake commercial for 'Tasteless Choice' instant coffee.

"Honey, I've been sleeping with our daughter."

"I'll make coffee!"

No one, at all, would get that today below the age of 35 or so, and at average, cut it off at 40.

Do they even still make Taster's Choice? Or Postum?

yournamehere said...

Norm MacDonald as Burt Reynolds was also great.

Alex Trebek:"It seems Mr. Reynolds has changed his name to 'Turd Ferguson'."

Burt Reynold: "Yeah, heh, it's a funny name."

Karlos said...

My favorite topic is "Colors that end in urple."

Cj

Kris said...

"All you need to do is name a number, any number, and you win . . ."

Classics. That, and more cowbell. Classics.

kiki said...

I love the old SNL Sketched with like, Gilda Radner & Co. Those were the days....

Anonymous said...

"Youll rue the day you crossed me Trebek"
Brilliant.

And you have literally wasted my work day.
Thank you.

*

Danielle said...

omg this is fucken hysterical....when he says mooooooo thats the sound your mother made last night!!!! hahahah i lvoe when dude says that this is a piss!

FigEqualsGood said...

Good Good stuff.

exile said...

the problem with snl is this, after doing week after week of live shows the well has run dry.

even the funniest person will start to repeat themselves after a while, and in SNL's case, even the unfunny gets repeated.

Dirk the Feeble said...

I liked the newest one, when Will Ferrell came back to host. That was good times.

Chief Slacker said...

yeah, SNL definteyl has it ups and downs now, they'll never have the soldi cast they had back in the day. At least they still do hit a few homers though.

Chief Slacker said...

yeah, SNL definteyl has it ups and downs now, they'll never have the soldi cast they had back in the day. At least they still do hit a few homers though.

Anna said...

Another awesome Will Ferrel skit that (is one of the few) that makes me laugh out loud, even upon repeated viewers: The Lovahs at the Welshly Arms --

Would you like to share some time with lovers in the hotUB? And feast on the duck meat, our loins glistening with want?

It's just hilarious :)