Tuesday, October 04, 2005

I Was Touched By His Noodly Appendage. Or, Obey Your Noodly Master.

I'm assuming that, due to my lack of posts for several days, there have been multiple suicides among readers. For that, I apologize and extend my deepest condolences to the grieving families.

For anyone that stuck it out (is there anyone left?), you will be richly rewarded. Maybe not by me, because my posts tend to have the sucking power of an industrial-sized vacuum, but as we know, God loves me, so certainly by Him. And by Him, I mean of course the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The idea of which is brilliant, and would be so even without the "Global Average Temperature vs. Number of Pirates" chart (that proves without a doubt that global warming is due to the decreasing number of pirates), but, as the chart is there, we don't even have to contemplate the brilliance of the article without the chart. Because it's there.

And, also, if you are trying to save money, do not go shopping in the FSM store. Because it is possible that you will want, as I do, everything there. Don't say I didn't warn you.

And now, I am off to eat at Spaghetti Works restaurant. I'm not sure if that constitutes worship or sacrilege. But it does constitute damn fine meatballs, brother.

22 comments:

Michael Manning said...

HI, JUST A NOTE TO LET YOU KNOW I LINKED YOU TO MY SITE!

scott c said...

This is by far the greatest thing you've ever posted.

WWFSMD?
sc.

The Blonde said...

Amen to meatballs....

Chixulub said...

Before you were an Anomymous Midwest Infant, 'National Lampoon' did a spoof on Time Magazine, about the 'Population Implosion.' It illustrated that everyone had two parents, four grand parents, eight, well, you get the idea.

Meaning that humanity was rapidly dwindling down and was one or two generations from extinction. Kinea like the pirate theory, but then, the global warming idea is probably bullshit too.

Enjoy your meatballs, and for your metaballs, I highly recommend How to Lie With Statistics by Darrell Huff, a hilarious book published before I was even a Midwest Rock Anything, before my parents even met. But it's still not out of date, and you'll never look at the news the same way again.

Joshua said...

wow i was so happy to see a comment on my site from you 30 seconds after i posted. it's good to hear that there's people out there looking at my site

yournamehere said...

Is Spaghetti Works sort of like Olive Garden for people who aren't morons?

K2 said...

mmmmmm.. spaghetti works. I don't even get that today, and it's my birfay.

Thanks to you and this post, I think I have now found the end to my agnostic beliefs.

Eye heart u! j00 is gr3at!

echrai said...

Hmm... can we eat of the body of the flying spaghetti monster? It sounds like the ideal lunch. Mmm.. with meatballs.

Shanda Lear said...

Where is this wonderous place called Spaghetti WOrks, and how do I get there.

sue said...

Since Michael mentioned it...did I tell you I linked you, too? I may have mentioned it in passing...

I would say eating at Spaghetti Works must be bowing to the god... but oh, how YUMMY it sounds right now!

P.S. Contemplated the suicide thing, but just couldn't get worked up enough. Sorry.

nic3oz said...

I heard about FSM a few days ago from a friend. I just purchased a "my dad's a pirate" shirt and cannot wait to wear it. I feel like I've been saved ;) R-amen

... jacek ... said...

just wanted to say that I've been a follower of the FYM since early july and it is really a good thing to see spreading the word. Thank you,

- el

Sangroncito said...

I love Spagetti! My favorite Italian restaurant here in Salvador closed while I was away and I have to find a new one.

Sangroncito said...

I love Spagetti! My favorite Italian restaurant here in Salvador closed while I was away and I have to find a new one.

Sangroncito said...

I love Spagetti! My favorite Italian restaurant here in Salvador closed while I was away and I have to find a new one.

Sangroncito said...

sorry! I like spagetti but not 3 times!

Johnny Menace said...

pirates are going extinct.... shouldn't they be in zoo's by now.

Zepplinlady said...

Momma Mi`a! Spaghetti and meat-ta-balls with salciccia and garlic bread reminds me of being on "the hill" with my Italian relatives.

Good food and lots of talking.(with hand gestures, of course)

Man, I'm really hungry now!

Walking Wounded said...

Jesus, since I'm back from the dark continent I have been craving all sorts of foods I didn't even eat when I was home. Spaghetti and meatballs was right up there! For the next two weeks I plan to eat anything I want to get it all out of my system. Good call, girl!

Peace

Anonymous said...

Only 19 people like you?
Clearly the suicide theory is panning out.
For the love of the FSM woman, don't go another day without posting, POST FSM damn you, POST!!

*

FigEqualsGood said...

I was wondering what has happened to that pirate I normally saw at Denny's on Thursday mornings. DAMN YOU ENVIRONMENT!

Anonymous said...

Unrelated, but "The Superficial" guy moved to www.wwtdd.com, which is way funnier than The Superficial with its new editor and has the same celeb gossip. FSM would want you to link it...