Wednesday, November 09, 2005

All I Really Need to Know in Life I Learned From Lindsey Murray.

Lesson 1: Do not wear a skirt when riding a bull, mechanical or otherwise.



Lesson 2: If the phone rings while you are riding a bull, and it's for the bull, you should probably let him talk.



Lesson 3: Everything on "Fear Factor" has the Fear Factor logo on it. Including the trash cans.



Lesson 4: When taking a picture of "Fear Factor" stunt being performed, the helicopter will turn out looking like a flea.



Lesson 5: Mickey Mouse, Cat Woman, Homer Simpson, Darth Vader, Spiderman, and Wonderwoman all DO exist and work on Hollywood Blvd.



Lesson 6: Kids in Ventura use nude car washes to raise money for school activities.



Lesson 7: Mustangs have tiny, cramped interiors that get uncomfortable quickly, aren't really that fast, and aren't worth the extra $5 a day for rental unless you get the GT, which we didn't. Also, the radio gets louder when you accelerate. Also, a suede jacket paired with a backpack is not a flattering look for anybody.



Lesson 8: Adam Sandlar has huge feet but small hands.



Lesson 9: Wine is good.



Lesson 10: Retarded children need thrift stores, too.



Lesson 11: Lindsey (yes, that's Lindsey of iMod fame) is the only person I know who can pull off shorts, a blazer, and high heels and look absolutely fabulous. Then again, girl can rock a Puma sweatband and white-and-red-striped knee socks and look fabulous, so I shouldn't be surprised. I unfortunately was too busy drinking $10 Long Island iced teas to take a picture of her fabulousness. Also, $10 Long Island iced teas will knock you on your ass.



Lesson 12: Lindsey can get you into The Comedy Store, which normally has a $15 cover, for free simply by saying, "It's me, Lindsey!" to the guy at the counter. I also have no pictures of this, because I was too busy thinking about what my next drink would be. Also, Jay London, of "Last Comic Standing" "fame"? Makes you want to kill youself.



Lesson 13: There is no lesson 13.

(And no, I don't have permission from these people to post their pictures - I'm running on the off chance that not everyone in the entire world reads this. Although I think we all know they should.)

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

"(And no, I don't have permission from these people to post their pictures - I'm running on the off chance that not everyone in the entire world reads this. Although I think we all know they should.)"

You are SO right! Hope you had so much fun that you barely remember it! Woo!

scott c said...

Wow.

AMG. Lindsey.

*head explodes*
sc.

sage said...

looks like you had fun! I take it the bull won?

Fizzgig said...

glad that Lindsey is still doing well! looks like you had a kick ass time too! cheers!

Just Me said...

next time just take the skirt off..i'm sure everybody would have appreciated that much more anyway

Unknown said...

Looks like an awesome trip! Too bad about the dogged Mustang. The GT does have more pepp. I'm surprised they let you ride the bull with shoes on, usually they make you take 'em off this way they don't go airborne if you're flopped off the bull! LOL

Peace

Anonymous said...

The picture with the dude cellphoning the bull is KEY!

That shit is fucking hilarious.

Glad to see you had a good trip.

sue said...

Very fun... and thank you for sharing!!

Anonymous said...

That is so where I buy all my clothes, drool guards and back braces!

Auntie M and Uncle Steiny said...

LOL. Hope you had a chance between $10 long islands and bull riding to check out the beach! California has some amazing beaches. Sounds like a fun trip!

Anonymous said...

It looks like a little too much fun!! Wish we were there! --anonymous midwest aunts

Unknown said...

Midwest Girl: Tommy Lee has a Star on the Walk of Fame? That's it. I'm raising money for yours!!!

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

That is so true about the retarded children, peace be upon them.

Anonymous said...

AMG AND Imod?

The mind boggles.
This is better than Pinky and the brain.
Can anything stand in their way?

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