Tuesday, November 22, 2005

And Before I Forget, There Was Also an Open Bar!

Yesterday started out as the crap day to end all crap days. I had to be up at 4:30 (yes, that's AM, as in entirely too freaking early), in order to be at work by 5:45, in order to be on a bus by 6:00, in order to drive three hours to a nearby metropolis, in order to attend a leadership seminar for women and minorities*. And yes, I am a woman, but did you know that I am also a minority? It's true! Evidence: left-handed (only 13% of the population), outie belly button (4%), two dimples (apparently no studies have been done on this), and...and....okay, that's about it as far as my uniqueness goes.

Any day that starts out like that is destined to be crap. And did I mention that at 6:02 they popped in "Monster-in-Law" so not only could I not sleep, I was subjected to two hours of J-Lo? At six in the morning? Before I was even really conscious? And that's just not fair.

However, once we got to the seminar, the day rapidly became better. First, they had a continental breakfast with a hot chocolate and coffee bar. Then there was a lunch with gourmet salads, panini sandwiches, soup, and your choice of cheesecake or chocolate cake (or both!) for dessert. Then there was a break with a chocolate fountain. Then there was a networking reception, which is corporate code for OPEN BAR, with even more food - crabcakes and sushi and smoked salmon and ravioli and did I mention the OPEN BAR? Then, on the ride back, we watched "Miracle," and I am a sucker for feel-good sports movies. What I am trying to say here is, I love free food. Especially really good free food. Especially when that really good free food comes with with free booze.



*Which, I have to say, I find mildly insulting. Are women and minorities that hard to train or so lacking in leadership skills that they have to separate us from the pack in order to teach us anything?**
**Wait, don't answer that.

21 comments:

NJ said...

I'm number 1!!! Kiss it people, I'm number 1!!

NJ said...

Ok, I'll read the post now. :-)

NJ said...

Free food and booze! How do I get to go to one of these woman and minority things?

NowhereGirl said...

I don't know AMG... conference day doesn't sound too bad, girl?!

Only 4% with outies? REALLY? My little guy has one... figured another thing he'll BLAME me for in 10 years?! ~chuckle~

ocg said...

As much as the morning sounded like a day from hell... it seemed to get much better as the day (read: food) progressed... I wouldn't mind a day like that around here....

Leese said...

My work never did anything like that. Consider yourself a LUCKY girl. Yep, free alcohol, it doesn't get much better than that.

Walking Wounded said...

Even 6pm is no time for Jenny from the block. Bleh.

Peace

Todd said...

I wake up to a flat-chested Latina that can't sing every morning. So don't feel too bad.

Popeye said...

Damn, wish I was a woman or a minority. . . Open bar. . .

exile said...

my training alway maintain a high suck factor

our snacks are in satan's vendimachine

Chixulub said...

Those seminars are quite the racket. I notice didn't have much to say about the 'content' (the part when you were thinking about how much more fun you had in Europe and California, and maybe wondering if they'll ever do a dimple study).

I've never been to one that served booze. The best approximation I ever got was the seminar on avoiding sex/age/race discrimination lawsuts where two fellow supervisors talked me into going to Hooters.

But the beer only made me sleepy, and the idea of going to Hooters during a discrimination law seminar was better than the actual food. Or the waitresses, all of whom I think were truants from a junior high school with anorexia.

I Gradumenated!! said...

Obviously you haven't forgetten that beer takes the edge off. Life isn't as bad as it was. The survey that I was extremely worried about is finally up and running and collecting "raw" data... The research papers come this weekend... followed by lots and lots of beer... no wait! My wife and I just spent the last 7 days in Moneterrey Mexico, and I purchased some Johnny Walker, Black Label whishkey from the Duty free & tax free shop for $31.00. That works too doesn't it?

Anonymous said...

No studies on double dimples?
What the-?

This is outrageous.
How can, you know scientists, do all the, you know important things if they don't have, like the building blocks like knowing about double dimple occurence?

Sheesh, what is wrong with this country?

And open bar?
Hmm, I feel us white males are definitely being discriminated aginst here.

*

AlRo said...

I am happily one of the 13% - and and.. get this - i even play guitar left handed - how rare is that.. not too many of those..

jimi hendrix, Doyle Bramhall II, Paul McCartney, Jeffery Gains.. i think that's all i can think of.. oh.. umm.. Nirvana dude that killed himself.. what the hell's his name? Kurt Kobain..

Dana said...

Free booze and a chocolate fountain? Too good to be true. Women and minorities really have all the luck. Are you sure you weren't still lying in bed dreaming?

You Can't Afford Me said...

Happy Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

Don't forget- Pocahantas only 15 generations ago and your proud Amish past.

You are a left-handed, double-dimpled, outie-buttoned blogging tattooed and pierced Native American Amish girl. Now, if THAT ain't a minority, i don't know what is!

Michael Manning said...

WISHING YOU A VERY HAPPY HANKSGIVING!

Hot T Finder said...

Congratulations!!! I wanted to let you know you have been chosen as The Bloggin Hottie Of The Day at “Bloggin Hotties”

http://blognhotties.blogspot.com

Sangroncito said...

Open bars are a little bit of heaven!

Anonymous Midwest Girl said...

Wow, Hot T Finder, I'm honored. Thanks! :)